True Beauty

Posted on September 12th, 2012 By in Circle of Love Coaching™ Program | Mindfulness | Personal Growth | Spiritual Development with 1 comment.

A Pretty Face Don’t Make No Pretty Heart

Just the other day, I heard a song come on the radio that really got me thinking.  It was “Bad Case of Loving You (Doctor, Doctor)” by the late Robert Palmer.

The line in the song that really got me was- are you ready for this:

“a pretty face….. don’t make no pretty heart”

WHOA!  There is surely some truth and discussion in these wise lyrics.  Let’s begin.  In our society in general, and especially in the dating world, people tend to place way too much emphasis on outer appearances.

I see this happen all the time- a guy spots an attractive woman, and, magnetized by her beauty, approaches her.  He then begins conversation, and if he’s “lucky” enough, gets her number and schedules their first date.  Add alcohol to the mix and you’ve really got yourself some trouble!

But here’s where things get funky.

He’s so intoxicated by her outer appearance, that when her true colors begin to show, he makes a variety of convenient excuses for her poor behavior.  It’s as if the trance of her outward appearance overwhelms the fact that he’s in a bad relationship.  This is a bad deal for him and he can’t (or doesn’t want to….) see it.  Truth is, outer beauty without inner beauty is a recipe for drama and heartache.

Maybe you’ve been there yourself……

Don’t get me wrong- this applies equally to both men and women.

I hear all sorts of things.  Stuff like:

But, he’s so successful”                          “But, he has such a great career”

But, she’s so hot!!”          “But, he’s an (actor, musician, athlete, etc…..)”

But, he has so much money”               “But, the sex is so good”

These are all delusions- time wasting excuses so you don’t have to deal with the reality that you’re caught up with someone who is clearly “not a good deal for you”.  As a professional who coaches people toward the best relationships they’ve ever imagined, I can assure you that you want your focus on what’s inside.

Are You Pretty On The Inside?

It’s true- pretty is as pretty does.  But what the heck does that really mean?  It means that true beauty comes from within- and when true beauty resides within, it will reveal itself in behaviors and actions.  Please read that again, it’s important.

Interestingly enough, the Bible has something to say on this.  In the book of Galatians, the apostle Paul lays out the fruits of the Spirit:  love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23)

Stretch, Grow, Become.

Are you that person?  I would encourage you to write down those 9 words and memorize the scripture.  Try to catch yourself the next time you detect that you’re being unloving, impatient, or anything else that you wouldn’t want to see in your future husband or wife.  Become the person you would want to be in relationship with!    Ask God to do a work in you, and make you into the person that’s worthy of His best.

Change isn’t easy.  If it was, everyone would be living the dream.  Having a coach who takes people from where they are to where they want to be makes all the difference.  Call me today to learn more.

Copyright © 2012   Scott Milnes   All Rights Reserved

One Response to “True Beauty”

  1. Christy Bartlett

    I totally relate to this article. I had one bad relationship after another. I dug deep inside and confronted myself as to why I was choosing these bad men. I realized that the insecurities and self-doubts I had about my personal worthiness was at the root. I accepted the little good I found in them and allowed it to supersede all of the negative that was also in them.

    Selfish, lazy, greedy, absorbing types of people are attracted to those who are lazy, insecure, unsure, and lack confidence. When I learned to hold myself accountable for the bad choices I was making, become more confident in myself, and hold true to what I want in my ideal partner and accept nothing less is when I found my husband. It’s like a crowded room parted and in the middle stood my husband, he was easy to find after I cleared the confusion out of my own head and heart.


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